i-am-a-fish:

grape-soda-city-kid:

i-am-a-fish:

i just got out-gayed at my own university and i want my tuition back, right now.

h o w d i d t h a t e v e n h a p p e n ? you’re the gayest gay to ever gay

I was robbed let me paint you a little picture. So it’s fuckin bingo night and I’m losing every game. I’m feeling sad and I really want to win one of the snack basket prizes but I have a terrible sheet. I’m considering giving up after my roommate leaves but they announce that the final competition for the last snack basket will be a dance off. So I’m like fuck yeah, because I can dance to next tuesday no problem, but then he shows up.

My mans steps up to plate, they got this snazzy strut going, black high heel boots on and booty shorts no less.

The music starts and I’m shredding and all but my mans (after shredding quite a bit themselves) just LEAPS onto the center platform and does the thing where you look away from the audience and do the squat (you know the squat im talking about).

I swear they must have known, they learned about the dance off before everyone else and they knew about me and they planned out every little detail to get in my head and destroy me from the –inside-.

I felt obliterated halfway through the song and couldn’t dance anymore, they won the competition, and guess what, they had the audacity to joyfully kiss their SIGNIFICANT OTHER immediately after winning.

I have never been so humiliated in my entire life, you couldn’t even tell I was also gay. I was utterly out-gayed on bingo night in front of all my bingo pals.